


The Only One I Trust

by AnnaRaven



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Dildos, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Gentle Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-11-01 02:52:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10912818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaRaven/pseuds/AnnaRaven
Summary: When Shepard confesses to Kaidan that he's never bottomed before, Kaidan makes it his mission to introduce his lover to a whole new world of pleasure.





	The Only One I Trust

**Author's Note:**

> Written for arkesstuff and citadelshushi on Tumblr from the prompt “You’re the only one I trust to do this.”

Everything about his new and still-fragile relationship with Kaidan was a revelation. 

When Kaidan told him at Apollo’s that he wanted him, wanted a relationship with him, it opened the floodgates on a depth of emotion and love and suppressed longing that Shepard had never even realised was there.

When Kaidan kissed him for the first time, standing in the blue light from the fish tank in his quarters, ethereal and so beautiful, it made Shepard’s heart clench and expand all at the same time, beating in a new rhythm he’d never expected to find.

When Kaidan unwittingly revealed to Shepard that he was ticklish around his ribs, Shepard seized on the information and pinned him to the bed that was once too big and cold, that was now a place of sanctuary and love, and Kaidan’s breathless laughter and bright eyes filled Shepard to the brim with an elation and possessiveness that he could never have found the words for.

And when they were naked in that bed one night, the first night that they’d done more than explore each other with hands and mouths, and he lay in the false twilight with Kaidan’s arms around him and still thrumming with pleasure from taking Kaidan for the first time, he found himself asking Kaidan why he enjoyed being fucked so much, confessing that he’d never had anyone do that to him. Kaidan seemed surprised but was characteristically honest, telling Shepard how good it felt to submit to someone he trusted; how the ache and the burn faded into something sweet and blissful and good that he couldn’t put into words; how having someone he loved (and his voice broke on the word) inside his body was one of the best feelings he could imagine.

When Kaidan asked Shepard, haltingly, hesitantly, if it was something he’d like to try, Shepard fought the impulse to say no and really thought about it. The idea of being so vulnerable was terrifying; the very idea of opening up to someone, physically or emotionally, had always filled him with dread. But this was Kaidan; sweet, honest, trustworthy Kaidan, who would never hurt him or use him or take advantage of him. Who he knew would be attentive and gentle, would put Shepard’s enjoyment ahead of his own. And he found that the thought of being open with this man, with letting him into his body and his heart, made Shepard tremble with want.

When Kaidan took his hand a few nights later and led him upstairs, just as the night cycle was beginning and the Normandy was falling asleep, Shepard went willingly, almost trembling with excited anticipation. Kaidan had told him to shower well that evening so Shepard knew what was coming, but he was somehow still blindsided by the possibilities that were still to come. 

Kaidan had taken time to prepare the room, Shepard noticed with a rush of love; the air was filled with quiet, gentle music and the scent of candles that had never been there before. The lights were dimmed and they walked through the cold blue glow of the fish tank to the warm amber light of the candles, flickering and calming. On the bed were the practical things they’d need, lubricant and condoms, but also a tapered glass dildo that almost made Shepard’s heart stop, just for a second. Kaidan saw him notice and said, “I want to ease you in gently, John. I’m not expecting anything from you; I want it to be good and easy and fun.”

When Kaidan kissed him, deep and slow and unhurried, Shepard relaxed under his mouth and hands, allowed himself to be undressed slowly, touching Kaidan’s body and face for reassurance when he needed to. When Kaidan lowered him onto his back on the bed and lay down beside him, Shepard concentrated on the familiarity of his kiss, of his touch, willing his body to relax.

When Kaidan’s hands began smoothing over his body, gently stroking his swelling cock and trembling thighs, Shepard closed his eyes and let the rush of love and excitement and arousal spread and grow until he could feel it everywhere. Kaidan coaxed him to open his legs, bent at the knee, feet planted comfortably, and a hint of panic tickled at the edge of Shepard’s pleasure. But Kaidan seemed to sense it, always so in tune with him, and he leaned over him to kiss him back to relaxation, his hand on Shepard’s cock, building his excitement with easy, languid strokes.

When Kaidan pressed a slick finger to Shepard’s hole it was good, familiar, something he’d done before. Kaidan added another finger but went slowly, and the sensation of the aching stretch and warm, calloused fingers inside him was something he knew, something he liked. Kaidan kept kissing him, touching him, allowing Shepard to relax into the feeling.

When Kaidan picked up the dildo and began to coat it, Shepard’s pulse kicked and spiked. His limbs were trembling with want and trepidation, but Kaidan’s eyes and smile kept him grounded. Kaidan moved closer, pumping Shepard’s cock gently, mouthing at his balls to get him hard again. The rounded tip of the dildo took over where his fingers had been and when it began to press slickly inside him, Shepard’s body jolted all on its own. Kaidan’s mouth took Shepard in, his tongue swirling around Shepard’s cock as he bobbed and sucked, distracting Shepard but also heightening the pleasure from the dildo invading his entrance. Shepard threaded his fingers into Kaidan’s hair, his heart thundering; the dildo slipped in further in a sudden slide and Shepard’s hips lifted from the bed, pressing his cock against the back of Kaidan’s throat, as a harsh, gasping groan surged unfettered from Shepard’s throat.

When Kaidan hoarsely asked, “Are you…do you need to stop?” Shepard shook his head mutely, catching his breath.

“No,” he said after a moment, raspy and needy. “I want this. You’re the only one I trust to do this.”

When Kaidan smiled, his eyes blazing with all the love and acceptance that Shepard could ever want, it made Shepard feel like he could do anything, achieve anything, fear nothing. And when Kaidan went down on him again, and the heat and moisture and suction made his cock swell and ache, he welcomed the blunt intrusion of the dildo and began to thrust his hips gently into the rhythm Kaidan had set. His nerve endings buzzed and sparked, his whole world narrowing to the pressure around his cock and the fullness in his ass. Kaidan pumped the dildo slowly in and out, following Shepard’s cues on when to go faster and when to slow down, balancing it with the firm, even slide of his lips and tongue. Shepard wanted more; harder, faster, fuller, and he’d barely panted out the words before Kaidan was complying.

His orgasm built and built forever, layer upon layer of pleasure and sensation, but still took him by surprise. Kaidan slowed the dildo but left it inside him as Shepard bucked into his mouth, taking everything Shepard had to give. And when his cock had stopped pulsing, the aftershocks fading, Kaidan withdrew the dildo and cleaned Shepard up lovingly, almost reverently, as Shepard closed his eyes and let his exhausted body relax.

When Kaidan climbed onto the bed beside him, his smile warm and just a little bit smug, Shepard pulled him close and kissed him, rolling him onto his back and licking his way down to Kaidan’s neglected cock. He made it his mission to hit every one of Kaidan’s sensitive points, to build his lover’s pleasure as wholly and painstakingly as Kaidan had done for him; he did everything he knew Kaidan loved, pleasuring him as though it was for the last time, until Kaidan was gasping and boneless and flushed beneath him.

And Shepard knew that if he lived to be a hundred years old, he would never love anyone the way he loved Kaidan Alenko.


End file.
